Standing in Your Strength

As men, we need to let go of this notion that we are competing with one another.

Let’s be honest, we are competing with our own insecurities, inadequacies and this collective fear of scarcity.


Hayden Image


As men , we don’t want to show any chinks in our armour or any sign of vulnerability.

Its a sign of weakness.

Stripping  ourselves naked in uncertainty and embracing change can be paralyzing, especially when you are white knuckling your only life line: self doubt, fear , and who we think we should be.

One hand over the other and painstakingly slowly.

We can start to question if we do have the strength?

For too long , I equated strength with the physical , and was  convinced that the physical was good enough .

It was a form of self delusion and once again looking outside myself for validation and acceptance. Wrapped up in a superficial packaging of worry about looking great.

At the time it was the best way that I knew how to take care of myself .

It makes no sense to get wrapped up in the judging , shaming , and then punishing myself . For too long that was the way that I treated myself ; it was the only way I knew how to love myself . A misguided form of self love .

The true measure of strength is treating ourselves with loving kindness and compassion.

Just because we have crossed that magical line in the sand doesn’t mean it’s happy ever after , in fact it’s brutal some days . It’s naive and we have mislead ourselves into this notion that we don’t have to keep working on our “shit”.


A samurai sword goes through a process of extreme heat to extreme cold over 1300 times to free it from internal stress.

It’s a process and at times can feel so painstakingly slow.

You want the immediate gratification ,the instant hit, the comic snap of the fingers……

When everything will be better when.

Better than what ?

Ill let you figure that out for yourself.

We are not here to tear each other down , but to help one another shine.

Do you really think you have made yourself taller by tearing down another person ?

You are not any taller.

All it takes is one little ripple, to create a massive WAVE.