Inside Out

What shirt will I chose today: the valiant SuperHero or my arch nemesis the Bogy Man?

 

At times I have reached for the Bogy Man shirt.
The BogyMan is the bizzaro to the Valliant SuperHero.
Notice that it’s all about choice and me. I choose – nobody else. Nobody makes me. Nobody is holding the door shut on me – it’s me, all me and nothing but me.Trust me ….. we create our own suffering.
Don’t fret; your delicate sense of self is not on the line. Opps, I mean my delicate sense of self. This has always been about me, and my predicament. 

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 Backwards or Inside out?

 

You made me feel this way.

How many times did I justify getting drunk or using because someone sent a combustible lightning bolt into my universe. But that was then: this is now. The victim card was my ace up the sleeve. The trump card of the Bogy Man.

 

Choosing to Stay in the Whitewash

Now my drug of choice for the Bogy Man is a cocktail of one part – the finger pointing of my own insecurities mixed with another part of entitlement of how I think you should treat me. Do not shake: stir lightly.

We don’t want to bruise the entitlement.

I can slip into the monkey brain, with the best of them, where I can obsess about how I feel that someone has sent me a combustible lightening bolt. I can keep playing it over and over in my mind. I can feel it – it must be real. The more I think about it, the more intense I feel it, and the more real it makes it. The more real, the more intensely I think about it – can you see a pattern developing here?

 

 

I choose to ride this wave…

One of the lessons that I learned – and trust me it was a hard lesson to learn (once again the 10 000 hour rule) was that I choose to ride this wave.

 

I am the one who gave it it’s meaning. I jumped on with both feet, and would ride out this wave of negativity. Each time I would feel the wave slowing down, I would add more momentum to it, to keep me up on the wave. Both fingers a blazing  pointing out was wrong with you and all so justifiably right with me. Need to remember that this would just take place in my mind (I’m not an asshole, only a true asshole would say it out loud). You know the obsessive Monkey Brain.

Childish…. umm, I was thinking more along the lines of dysfunctional and very self-limiting. Each time I resort to the Bogy Man two-step I keep myself trapped in a very limiting comfort zone. Operating at a very low frequency. If I focus on the negative, how the heck can I focus on the positive. A muscle can not fire and relax at the same time. If I waste my time on the bottom feeders, how will I ever be in position to ride something truly epic?

Maybe I’m the only one who does this -obsesses about what someone said or didn’t say to them.

Maybe I’m the only one who keeps playing it over and over in their mind.

Maybe I’m the only one who has a judge, jury, and executioner upholding the sacred halls of justice.

But as Buck Naked taught me it doesn’t change a damn thing.

 

Life and the Race Course do not Respect Past Results

It never ceases to amaze me the all to subtle kicks in the ass that life gives me. I still need to do the reps.

 

Off to the nearest telephone booth to change shirts ….

It was never about someone else, it was what I was doing to myself. I chose to ride the bottom feeders. I still need to have the self-awareness to recognize when I do put my shirt on inside out, and I had it backwards all along.

Maybe it’s time we all started looking inside out? How do you get rid of the weeds in your garden?

AS AlWAYS MY PREDICAMENT IS MYSELF.

 

CHALLENGE YOURSELF

In this book you will find 60 challenges. One for each week of the year & some more. Some might seem silly to you but do them anyway. You will change a little bit & usually have a smile on your face after. That is the point – to smile more thought life, enjoy the whole journey & not just when you reach your goals or your dreams.

 


 

Challenge Yourself

FOLLOW YOUR BLISS

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